‘Tis The Season To Be Careful
No, we’re not talking about swearing off sex, or even avoiding what others might think of as indiscretions at the office Christmas party. But safe sex - now that is a good idea!
Anne Sexton, 09 Dec 2008
A few years ago, after the office Christmas party my friend had sex with her boss. Back in the days when the Celtic Tiger purred like a kitten, her company had gone all-out, and paid for an overnighter at a hotel and spa. At some point between the dancing and the dawn, my friend, who best remain nameless, found herself naked and downing yet more booze from the boss’s mini-bar.
“It was an accident,” she said.
“How do you sleep with someone by accident?” I wanted to know. Freud claimed there are no accidents and while I doubt he was thinking about these kinds of sexual shenanigans (although being Freud you never know), it seemed to me that knocking on someone’s hotel door during the middle of the night is not exactly like stubbing your toe. It requires a bit more forethought.
“We’ll it’s not like I planned it,” she explained. “It just happened.” But I still wasn’t buying it. First, because she’d been on about what a ride he was for months, and secondly because I knew she’d been for a full leg and Brazilian the week before. From what I could see, she’d taken the earliest convenient opportunity to find out if he really was as good as he looked. (Which incidentally he was. “The best sex, ever!” according to my friend. But of course the sex you’re not supposed to be having often is – it’s one of the universe’s cruel little jokes.)
Along with the coloured lights and panic shopping, you know it’s Christmas once dire warnings of the dangers of holiday excess start to hit the press. Every year we are reminded that when it comes to the Christmas party it’s best not to a) drink too much, b) flirt too much (particularly outside your pay grade) or c) get into compromising positions with colleagues.
Every year this advice is ignored by a lot, perhaps even most, of us. As soon as December rolls around, we’re in party-mode and there’s no stopping us. For thousands of years human beings have celebrated in and around the winter solstice. The Romans had Saturnalia, the Greeks Chronos, the Germanic people celebrated Yule and the Celts had Wren Day. All these festivals included a bit of religion and a lot of merry-making including feasting, music and gift giving. You can’t fight the Christmas spirit – it’s in our bones. And besides, someone else is paying (thanks Mr Stokes!).
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